The Avid Reader (and enjoyer of all subjects)

Even though I mentioned in the previous post that I would visit Bear World next year, my mom, sister, and I decided to visit Bear World today.  Bear World, located in Rexburg, is known for its numerous bears, but it also houses many more animals like bison, mountain goats, and all sorts of deer.  It is almost like a zoo, because park rangers limit the space an animal can roam and feed the animal, whereas in the wild, an animal roams freely and hunts for food.  Bear World was closer to our rented apartment in Idaho Falls than West Yellowstone.  We started out for Bear World in the morning.

When we got there, the first thing we noticed was a car stopped beside a deer.  We drove inside the park as fast as we could (which was only about 10 miles per hour, anyways).  We came across two bison and deer.  There were plenty of deer lying around.  Then, I spotted a brown object, very close by.  It was a grizzly bear!  This had been our first close encounter with a grizzly bear.  Suddenly, another grizzly’s head popped up from the grass.  Amazed, we drove on.

After seeing a few grizzlies and four turkeys making a din, we went on to the section for black bears and wolves.  There were special artificial caves made for the animals, and most of the black bears were lumbering about their own cave.  We only saw one wolf–a sleeping timber wolf lying a few feet from the road.  We made sure to avoid it, for wolves can be dangerous at times.  I later learned that there was supposed to be a pack of wolves.  I’m not sure if the wolf was the Alpha Male of the pack.

Soon, after spotting a huge moose with some of his duck companions, we came to the gift shop.  We didn’t buy anything there.  Instead, we went through the back doors to a totally different place.  There, I saw a pen with three black bears inside–two brown and one black.  The bears had been brought to the pen so that they would be protected from the violent male bears.  Fortunately for us, the bears were thoroughly awake and not full, so we got to see some of their action.  At first, one brown bear became determined to climb a log in their confined area.  It was stranded on it, then rolled over.  Then, the brown bears tussled with each other–nonstop.  They snapped their mouths and tried to bite one another.  Through all this hubbub, the black bear just walked around, looking at the fight.

While the bears continued their brawl, we went away to see Bear World’s lagoon.  We passed by another area specially for three black bears.  The black bears weren’t as aggressive as the grizzlies had been.  In the lagoon, I discovered a large mute swan, some ducks, some Canadian geese, and countless numbers of rainbow trout.  My sister wanted to buy a pack full of bread, and we fed the animals in the lagoon.  The swan was very slow in getting to the food, so the agile trout got most of the bread.

Soon, at lunchtime, we returned to the bear pen.  The brown bears had decided to stop fighting, and all three bears lined up, ready for food.  When it didn’t come soon, they began to get aggressive again, and made a ruckus of howls.  Some visitors got the opportunity to feed the bears.  By the amount of the milk the bears drank, I could tell that they were starving.  One of the bears was still hungry after five bottles of milk!

After a delectable lunch, we decided to visit the petting zoo, because there were many baby animals there.  At first, I dreaded that we would need to pay, but the man at the petting zoo entrance said the admission was free.  There were many chickens, roosters, hens, turkeys, ducks, and geese running about.  We were more interested in the deer (two adults, one adolescent, and two fawns) and mountain goats (one adult and two kids).  At first, my sister tried petting a baby mountain goat, but it leapt away.  Then, my sister tried to pet the other baby mountain goat.  It just stood there, allowing my sister to feel its smooth back.  That’s the reason why we took so many pictures of it.  (That’s also the reason why her new blog is named “Goat World” and her blog’s site address is http://snowflakethegoat.edublogs.org.)  The fawns were very adorable, but they didn’t want us to pet them.  We also saw the biggest pig I have ever seen, an enormous gray pig.  It was sleeping in the shade by a small penned-up area, snoring loudly, and its skin was very rough.  My sister decided to make some grunts, and the pig, still sleeping, replied in the form of a snore.  After a while, however, it decided to stop imitating my sister.  There were a few peacocks, too.  We saw the elegant male spread out all its wings.  The female was busy protecting a tiny yellow chick.

When we had left the pen, we saw a poster advertising for us to adopt an animal (pay money to give it some more amenities).  My sister saw that the name of one of the mountain goats was Snowflake (which is why her blog address contains the name “Snowflake”.  I noticed a $2,500 amount for Choctaw, a white elk.  White elk are very rare and hard to maintain.  They are NOT albino, but leucistic instead.  Choctaw’s mother was a white elk and his father was normal.

We took another look at the bears.  The bears were sluggish.  They were staying inside their cave, not fighting at all, and staying away from the burning sunshine.  Luckily, we had observed their active behavior.

Finally, it was time to head back home.  Since we couldn’t find the exit, we decided to re-tour Bear World.  This time, almost all of the bears were hiding inside their caves.  We did manage to see Choctaw, indeed a white elk, lying in the shade with his friends.  The timber wolf had vanished.  We soon found the exit, and awed by the behavior of the animals, headed back home.

Even though you might have been a bit filled with the descriptions of events at Yellowstone in the previous two posts, hey, it was just a two-day visit, and our $25 pass was valid for one week, and at Grand Teton (which is characterized by its three mountains).  We did miss a lot of things, and we do need to revisit some places.

• Morning Glory Pool (New Visit).  Morning Glory Pool is a beautiful pool with different types of algae resembling different colors.  The colors are in rainbow progression as you come closer to the center.  Though the shade may look inviting, visitors know better than to jump in the seemingly refreshing pool and relax.
• Middle Geyser Basin (New Visit). Yes, we didn’t stop for Middle Geyser Basin after Lower Geyser Basin, and of course we need to view geysers here.
• West Thumb Geyser Basin (New Visit). Even one of Yellowstone’s minor geyser basins deserves a visit.
• Yellowstone Lake (New Visit). We had no time to visit the lake, so from there I can expand–fishing, boating, viewing wildlife,…
• Petrified Tree (New Visit). I hadn’t heard of Petrified Tree that much, even in the park, until I saw it on a map showing the Idaho-Montana-Wyoming-beyond state cluster, same font as Old Faithful.  It sounds interesting.
• Bear World (New Visit). In Bear World, visitors no longer have to stay and search for bears in the distance.  Sometimes, bears roam the roads–they are right in front of your car!  It would be wonderful to view this world.
• GRAND TETON NATIONAL PARK (New Visit). “Are you serious, theavidreader!?!?!?  You wrote too much for me to remember, and you forgot to visit a whole new park!”  Next time we’ll utilize our money wiser, for even more breathtaking views and more wildlife.
• Upper Geyser Basin (Revisit). We scanned this, too, for only a short time before heading on.
• Mount Washburn (Revisit). Had I known that bighorn sheep lived on Mount Washburn, I would have continued despite my enervation.  And it would be a pity to miss the beautiful sunrise visitors talk about.
• Tower Falls (Revisit). This shouldn’t even count as a revisit–we saw Tower Falls for only a couple of seconds!  We really need to peruse this waterfall.
• Sheepeater’s Cliff (Revisit). Next time, I’ll try to climb the cliff, throwing away my acrophobic fears.  And my sister will try to get to the top of the cliff!
• Norris Geyser (Revisit). So Norris Geyser was the last leg of our journey.  And we didn’t even capture it on camera!
• Porcelain Geyser (Revisit). My dad and I were “browsing” Porcelain Geyser Basin for a few minutes before we were called in by my mom and sister.

We woke up at around 7:30.  My parents instantly pointed out that our supplies were diminishing, so we went 3 miles to Cooke City to buy some food (my sister got Pringles, my mom got dried apples, and I got salted peanuts) and get some gas.  Then, we set off immediately for Wyoming–and Yellowstone.

When we entered the park, there was no sign of wildlife–because most animals are shy and afraid of visitors.  However, after some minutes, we caught sight of a bison grazing.  Pretty soon, we arrived at Lamar Valley again.  This time, we saw two pronghorns, one male and one female.  Also, pikas were present in profuse amounts.  We also stopped for a bathroom break and saw some swallows’ bird nests.  They were everywhere, in their nests at one moment and out catching insects the next.  There were a few bison in the background.

Once we had passed Lamar Valley, we went on the mountains, headed for Mammoth Hot Springs.  My dad had planned to climb Mount Washburn again to view the beautiful sunrise, but it was already too late for that, and I didn’t want another ordeal.  In a forest, we suddenly came upon some heavy traffic.  I saw something big with antlers, and thought it was a moose.  However, one visitor told me that it was a bull elk.  After minutes of fawning over the animal (some people were a few feet away snapping picture after picture), one impatient tourist told everyone that it was illegal to be that close to the elk–visitors had to stay at least 25 yards away from all animals besides bison and wolves (visitors needed to stay a football field’s length away from those animals).  Everyone piled into their cars, but still it created a huge traffic jam.

After driving some more, we came upon another group of parked cars and a row of tourists with binoculars.  They were looking in the distance, but we couldn’t see anything.  A passerby told us that there was a grizzly bear hiding in the shadows of the trees.  Suddenly, I caught sight of a brown mass lumbering away.  It was obviously the grizzly!  I showed my parents and sister the location.  Other visitors claimed they had seen a coyote, and my parents saw it too, but I didn’t.

We at last reached Mammoth Hot Springs.  First, we had lunch there.  (Only I had a “real” lunch; my dad had a small apple turnover, my sister had a cranberry juice drink, and my mom had a banana and peach.)  Very near Mammoth Hot Springs, there were some mule deer.  I spotted a cluster of them laying by a building.  Mammoth Hot Springs required quite a lot of walking, especially up mountains, and I imagined a much more beautiful scene.  I guess Mammoth Hot Springs would have to be my “Most Disappointing Attraction”.

Our next–and final–stop would be the Norris Geyser Basin.  During the trip there, my dad found another bull elk eating plants.  Nobody had seen it yet.  Soon, one truck came over.  Another car which had been going the opposite way backed up to see it.  We avoided the crowd just in time!  We also came across a cliff called the Sheepeater’s Cliff.  Named after the Sheepeater Indians who lived in the area, the cliff is a bunch of rocks that rise up, resembling an exponential function (rather, a logarithmic function reflected over the x-axis).  My sister and dad tried to climb the cliff, but my dad would only allow my sister up to the point when the cliff started zooming up almost vertically.  My acrophobic fears made me avoid the cliff altogether.  After that, we arrived at Norris Geyser.  Norris Geyser is the hottest geyser basin in Yellowstone.  It contains Steamboat Geyser, the world’s tallest erupting geyser; and Echinus Geyser, the world’s largest acidic geyser.  We did see occasional eruptions of water from Steamboat Geyser 5-10 feet, but unlike Old Faithful, Steamboat Geyser is not predictable, and it could be from 4 hours to over 10 years between eruptions.  When Steamboat Geyser is about to erupt, neighboring Cistern Pool drains of water.  I was anxious to see if this had happened, but unfortunately we could not locate Cistern Pool.  Still, the walk around the geysers was perfect except for the rotten egg smell (sulfur) and the lack of supposedly abundant wildlife.  My dad and I wanted to view nearby Porcelain Geyser Basin (my mom and sister headed for the museum to avoid the odors), but we didn’t get to see much of it because my mom and sister called my dad and I over to the museum (which was composed of two rooms).

After viewing the museum, we had to say good-bye to Yellowstone.  It had been a VERY lovely stay, exceeding already-high expectations, well worth countless more visits, unlike any other park we had seen, and certainly one place we will visit again next year.

One of the most known national parks in the world and a site for about half of the world’s geysers, Yellowstone National Park was the first national park.  It is home to many species of animals (even though it contains only 7 species of trees) and of course many geysers, hot springs, mudpots, and fumaroles.  However, don’t forget that Yellowstone is a big volcano, and around 2,000 earthquakes occur in it annually!

We set off from Idaho Falls for the West Yellowstone entrance quite early.  The drive was quite uneventful (except for the breathtaking mountain views, Teton mountain views, and occasional glimpses of cows and horses) and took 90 minutes.  A few miles away, we passed through Targhee National Forest.  Then, the landscape was sparse, with almost no houses or buildings at all.  Suddenly, after some miles, we caught sight of many buildings.  Soon, the figure of a toll booth appeared.  This was the West Entrance.  We got a few maps and brochures from the park ranger, and then went cruising around, anxious to see some of Yellowstone’s sights.

Only a minute after passing through the West Entrance, I caught sight of a gray dog-like animal in the distance.  It was a wolf or a coyote.  The wolf/coyote looked at us for a few seconds, then walked off.  When we had driven for a few more minutes, we saw a crowd of visitors.  We looked out to the plains and found that there were three mule deer leaping about a river.  We saw a few more mule deer, then went on.

Our first stop was the Lower, Middle, and Upper Geyser Basins.  We were incredulous at the steam billowing from the geysers in the Lower Geyser Basin.  The only negative thing was that the geysers smelled like rotten eggs!  We also caught sight of a large herd of bison grazing nearby.  Bison are very unpredictable.  They can sprint up to 30 miles an hour when angry (and they especially do so when mating, protecting food, or protecting young), so we had to stay at least 100 yards away from the nearest bison.

Our next stop was Old Faithful Geyser.  There are many myths about Old Faithful.  One of the most commonly mistaken beliefs is that Old Faithful is the tallest geyser in Yellowstone.  That is NOT true–Steamboat Geyser in Norris Geyser Basin holds that position.  Another myth–what my dad thought–was that park rangers could control the eruptions.  No way!  Here are the facts:  Old Faithful’s eruptions range from 100 feet to over 180 feet, with an average of 130 feet.  It erupts (on average) every 92 minutes.  During this time, around 4,000 gallons of water are expelled every eruption!

We had to drive a long time to get there.  In fact, it was already lunch time!  We had a quick meal there, then went loafing around the general store for some souvenirs.  I got a Yellowstone cup, my sister got a sweater, and we all bought some postcards.  We also got a piggy bank for our neighbors.  Unfortunately, we had some difficulty locating Old Faithful and its parking lot, so we missed its eruption at 12:25 PM and had to wait for 92 minutes!  Old Faithful was scheduled to erupt again at 2:01 PM.  However, at 2:02 PM it still hadn’t erupted–there were just short bursts of hot water.  Everyone was beginning to question the “faithfulness” of the famous geyser.  However, soon enough the water skyrocketed up to 100+ feet and astounded everyone in the crowd.  I thought Old Faithful was the best part of Yellowstone!  Of course, we didn’t forget to capture photos of nearby Craig Pass.

Then, we set our destination as West Thumb and neighboring Yellowstone Lake.  West Thumb is one of the smallest geyser basins in the national park–so small that after we passed it, I was still inquiring, “Where is West Thumb?”  (We didn’t actually visit West Thumb.)  We caught views of Yellowstone Lake and made sure to capture both snowcapped mountains and the lake while driving by.  My dad spotted a black-and-white duck swimming by.  However, we didn’t go boating or fishing.

We also made sure to stop at the Yellowstone Canyon/Waterfall.  Before Yellowstone Canyon, we needed to pass through Hayden Valley.  Hayden Valley is supposed to be one of the areas with the most wildlife (behind Lamar Valley), but all we saw were herds of bison.  At Yellowstone Canyon/Waterfall, the views were absolutely breathtaking (my mother said this had been her favorite part of the whole trip), but we had to walk close to a mile to get to there.  It was very hard not to look down, and my acrophobia kept me from thoroughly enjoying the canyon and river.

We stopped at a mud volcano, too.  The mud volcano was very smelly.  My dad wanted to see the Black Dragon Cauldron, but my sister objected, saying that the smell was too strong and that we couldn’t bear a 1-mile walk.

The next stop was Tower Falls, but that was quite far away.  We made plenty of short stops on the way–wherever there were animals, we stopped.  We came upon a whitewater river at first.  Even though I thought no fish would want to endure the perils of this habitat, my dad and I spotted some leaping trout.  There was also a pelican passing by the more peaceful waters some yards away, with a fish.  Then, we came across Mount Washburn, and my dad encouraged us to climb it.  However, I was already bone-weary from all the walking we had to do, so we didn’t reach the summit.  My parents spotted a yellow-bellied marmot and its mate, though, and a nearby chipmunk.  My sister was peeved off by my exhaustion, because she wanted to see the bighorn sheep near the apex.  (I guess we’ll save that for another visit.)  Strangely enough, my dad said that climbing Mount Washburn had been his favorite part!  Later, in the dark, we also found a big group of cars blocking traffic.  It turned out that there was a black bear!  It vanished, but visitors caught a glimpse of a black bear cub.  We got a very good view of it from our car, and my dad took a picture of it on his cell phone.

We arrived at Tower Falls, but I was starving, the stores there were all closed, and we hadn’t reserved any hotel/motel rooms!  (My dad suggested sleeping in the car.)  We could only get a peek of Tower Falls before my parents tried to locate food and lodging.  We tried nearby Roosevelt Lodge’s food, but to our dismay the wait would be 45 minutes!  Our final solution was a 30-mile trip to Silver Gate and Cooke City in Montana.  Fortunately, this path would take us through the wildlife-abundant Lamar Valley.  Indeed, evening was one of the best times to spot animals.  A gray wolf with shining eyes came within our sight, and we also saw more bison and a couple of deer.  My dad claimed to have seen a mountain goat.  One bison was only a few feet away from our stopped car.  At one point, a mule deer stood inn front of a group of cars, not moving at all!  At Silver Gate, we ate at a log cabin cafe and had delicious crab with steak.  We stayed at a comfortable, cozy log cabin for the night and prepared for the rest of Yellowstone the next day.

Greetings from Idaho Falls!  Today, I had to wake up at 4:45 AM ( ) to catch my flight.  The flight itself was uneventful.  It took four hours!  When my mom, sister, and I were prepared to land in Utah, we caught a glimpse of the beautiful snow-capped Rocky Mountains.  Unfortunately, I didn’t have a camera I could use.

After the flight, my dad came to the airport to pick us up, and we drove for 3 hours to Idaho Falls, catching breath-taking views of the mountains.  Currently, I am in our rented apartment, and it is hailing outside!  The hailstones’ diameters are about 1 centimeter, but I have never experienced such crazy weather.

Tomorrow is Yellowstone!  I will stay there for two days, then visit other sites in Idaho Falls.

Fourth in a series of fun literature use.  Today featuring:  a dialogue between a teacher and a student.

Mr. Bane L. Platitude (nicknamed Redundancy) is instructing a 60-year-old man, Nick (nicknamed Moro by his mocking peers) who self-taught himself about 2nd grade vocabulary.

MR. BANE L. PLATITUDE:  Okay, so you remember what we were talking about yesterday?

NICK:  Uh…I forget.

BANE L. PLATITUDE:  I forgot, too.  Hmm…let me see…oh yeah, 2nd grade sesquipedalian vocabulary!  Having a sesquipedalian vocabulary is very important to your future career, and especially when you take the SATs when you’re 80.  Having a sesquipedalian vocabulary is very important because it helps you and is vital.  Having a sesquipedalian vocabulary is also important because, as everyone always says, it may hurt to be missing something but it may not hurt to have extra stuff and things and blah blah blah you don’t need to know this thing in the textbook…

NICK:  Uh…I think this is what we went over yesterday.  And the day before yesterday.  It’s getting a bit soporific.

BANE L. PLATITUDE:  Sorry about that.  Anyways, we were talking about having a sesquipedalian vocabulary because it’s good to have extra but not good to have a dearth.  And, I’m sure you haven’t heard of this phrase before:  It’s good to review over everything before.  It is, after all, vital to know all your reasons for having a sesquipedalian vocabulary.  That’s one very vital thing.  So, I can emphasize more, know why you need to have a sesquipedalian vocabulary.  You need to know this before you start learning your actual vocabulary words.

NICK:  Great.  I already have that understood, and my vocabulary words.  I can take my SATs 20 years before you think!

BANE L. PLATITUDE:  Good.  Now that you already know your vocabulary words, I can educate you more about why it is important to have a sesquipedalian vocabulary.  It is vital and necessary, unmistakably beneficial, propitious…

NICK:  This will take forever.

BANE L. PLATITUDE:  The point!  I want to educate you thoroughly.

*******

(Lesson finished; I don’t want to make this more soporific for readers.)

BANE L. PLATITUDE:  Now we’re going to take a quiz.

NICK:  Sure, let me ace it.

BANE L. PLATITUDE:  Question 1.  Why is it important to have a sesquipedalian vocabulary?

NICK:  It’s vital to have a sesquipedalian vocabulary.

BANE L. PLATITUDE:  Incorrect.  The answer is because it is important.  Question number 2.  What is the definition of pulchritude?  Now I’m sure you’ll never even learn to spell this one, let alone learn its meaning.

NICK:  Pulchritude is spelled P-U-L-C-H-R-I-T-U-D-E.  Its definition is physical beauty and its part of speech is a noun.

Third in a series of fun literature use while doing Word Within the Word.  Today:  In a world where a year is a minute.

Whirring through cosmos

Letting the ages go by 

A heliotropic world in which

525600* becomes 1

Feeling pain, relaxation, embarrassment, bliss, anger

All for but a fraction of a second

Watching the animals transmogrify 

Viewing the plants as they whirl

Experiencing life for 80 minutes

Then expiring

And coming back to life

Feeling pain, relaxation, embarrassment, bliss, anger

All for but a fraction of a second.

*Why 525600, as you might ask?  525600 is the number of minutes in a year.

Second in a series of fun literature use.  Today:  a counterfeit ad for a pest controller!  (I bet the people who would actually make such an ad are frauds and cheats.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SUPER DE-BUGGER*

New!  New!  Get rid of your house pests NOW!

Tired of eliminating bugs from interstices yourself?  Exhausted that your old pest-control sprays won’t work?  Antagonized at the abasing comments your condescending neighbors offer?  Intimidated by the fake praise from obsequious friends?  Well, we have the right retort–Super De-Bugger!  Studies show that Super De-Bugger is 25%** more efficient than your average pest-control spray, eliminating 99.9%** of all germs!   Super De-Bugger poisons pests, making them inanimate within seconds, while most pest-control sprays don’t have the ability to kill them! 

What’s more, Super De-Bugger comes with the Eradicator, a new fuel that has been shown to eliminate 100%** of all dead pests.  That’s 50%** more than your average pest-control spray can do! 

Call 1-800-SUP-DBUG to receive both of these products for only $199.95 $19.95***!  That’s 1-800-SUP-DBUG.  We accept cash, check, credit`, and debit.  Order today!

—————————

COUPON:  50%“ off

—————————

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Works 20% of the time if used correctly.  Works 0% of the time if used incorrectly.

**Figures not proven by Super De-Bugger.

*** Works only with coupon.  Otherwise $199.95.

`Includes VISA and MasterCard only.

“Increase in tax by 300%.  Shipping/Handling fee $149.95

Okay, I decided to make up a random play (not fictitious, of course ).

CHARACTERS:

Justin Luo (better known as ZHEN), a vocabulary whiz

Yang Li (better known as ROY), a loquacious proponent of electric guitars and heavy metal

Samuel Chao, an overly enthusiastic follower of ROY

[Scene setting: In Carnage Middle School grounds.  On a bench on Carnage School Park, there is an MP3 player.  ZHEN picks is up and looks at it briefly before putting the earphones into his ears.  ZHEN's peers, ROY and SAMUEL follow.]

ROY:  Hmm.  Nice MP3 player you’ve got there.  What are you listening to?

[no response]

SAMUEL:  I think…

ROY:  Is that classical music I hear?

ZHEN:  [looking up at Roy] Yes.

[The sound of music goes to a fortissimo.]

ROY:  How perfidious.  Turn that off.

ZHEN:  No.

ROY:  You are breaking a sacrosanct rule in our society.  Don’t listen to that cacophonious music anymore.  It’s obsolete already.  Even Samuel thinks so.  Don’t contravene me now.  Or Samuel.

SAMUEL:  Yeah, Zhen.  How heterodox.

ZHEN:  Never.

ROY:  [incredulous] How…this is ridiculous!  You know that listening to classical music is an interdiction.  The government banned it already, and the president hates it.  Look, Zhen, don’t start another altercation.  I know you don’t like them.  You already lost most of them.  Besides,…

ZHEN:  Aver.

SAMUEL:  Aver what?  Aver that…

ROY:  Aver the interdiction?  Aver that you’ve lost most of our altercations?  What?

ZHEN:  First choice.

ROY:  You already know about the interdiction, Zhen.  Aren’t you a news maniac?

SAMUEL:  I think he’s…

ROY:  No, let me deal with this.  [Turning back to ZHEN] This is perfidy, you hear me?  Music from electric guitars and heavy metal drums are sacrosanct!  Why can’t you ever enjoy 22nd century music?  It’s so futile to contravene us!

ZHEN:  Circumlocution.

ROY:  What do you mean, circumlocution?  I’m doing this for your own good!  You’re the one who started it!

ZHEN:  Impugning.

ROY:  Right, you’re the one who impugns electric guitars and heavy metal!  Now stop showing off your vocabulary, and…

ZHEN:  Egocentric.

ROY:  Huh?  Oh, yeah, you are egocentric.  Good, Zhen, you’re finally admitting it!

ZHEN:  False.

ROY:  You vacillating bigot, just admit it!

SAMUEL:  [sighs] He will, I bet.

ZHEN:  False.

SAMUEL:  So you’re saying that you won’t admit it?

ZHEN: True.

ROY:  Ugh.  I knew from the start how weird this Zhen would turn out to be.

ZHEN:  See bee.

ROY and SAMUEL:  [nonplussed] Now where did that come from?

ZHEN:  [taking off his earphones] Eureka!  Eureka!

ROY:  He sounds like an Archimedes gone bananas.

ZHEN:  Guess what?  I was just playing a vocabulary quiz on the MP3 player, and I got 10 out of 10!  So I get a free MP3 player! 

ROY and SAMUEL:  What quiz?

ZHEN:  Umm…on the MP3 player, you remember?  When Roy was saying a soliloquy or something?

Fictitious:  My vocabulary skills (they aren’t as good as the play suggests); Roy, Samuel, and I in 22nd century and still in Carnage

Not fictitious:  Roy and Samuel criticizing me; me getting an MP3 player soon (so that I won’t be bored on the 30-minute route to Carnage)